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Hey Walking Dead…Please Don’t Make Me Hate You

Okay folks – don’t read this if you have not seen last night’s mid-season finale of The Walking Dead, as I am about to give an opinion that will surely spoil it – lackluster as it was. So, for now, look at this zombie –

With that said….WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?????????? Is this the same show? Last season had me hooked and on the edge of my seat, and here we are after 6 episodes of S2 and I am left scratching my head. The first half of this season has been abysmal. That’s right – I said ABYSMAL. The plot is moving at a zombie snail’s pace and I pretty much hate everyone now. Other than Daryl, the zombies have more personality than the camp.  I am tired of Andrea playing Annie Oakley, Shane and his southern drawl need to go take a hike, and Rick is an oblivious asshole. Carl has become the most intelligent human still walking. Also, what is he – like 7? Let’s give him gun training, because THAT'S a good idea. Glenn has been too stereotyped into the fall guy, and don’t get me started on Hershel and his people (other than Maggie, who I adore – and not just because Lauren Cohan was on both Chuck and Vampire Diaries). This delusional man thinks Walkers are just sick people and can eventually be saved. Sure, you feel bad for him, since his wife and stepson are included in the Barn Zombies. But come on guy, your wife will eat your face, just sayin’.

I have deduced that the characters have been reduced to a bunch of morons after living on this farm. Maybe it’s the water they’ve been drinking out of that well with the dead zombie juice in it. Seriously, that was the one single gross thing this whole time. Is this show about killing zombies or playing FarmVille?

The storyline also has me annoyed. I can honestly say that not too much happened in S2 so far. Now sure, in a 22 episode season that may be okay. But we are half done people! These jerks spent SIX episodes looking for Sophia, and you mean to tell me after hours or us watching them run around SHE WAS IN THE BARN THE WHOLE TIME!!!! Are you serious bro? My man Daryl falls down a hill, gets stabbed with his own arrow, hallucinates, climbs back up the hill, falls down it again, goes apeshit, eats a raw squirrel, kills some Walkers and makes a fancy zombie-ear necklace (coming to AMC Shop.com real soon), and he doesn’t get to save poor little Sophia! SHENANIGANS! I was pissed. Other than the whole pro-life undertones, all that really happened was Shane turned into more of an asshole than he already was, Carl got shot and Lori got pregnant. That’s it. Everything else I have forgotten already. Now, let's have some more zombies…